Graduation and Wavelengths

Earlier this month, I found out that I was graduating University with a 2:1. Not only that, but that I managed to achieve a first in my dissertation – something that was both the hardest and best thing I ever did at uni. The standard: ‘cruise by and get a 2:1, work a little harder and get a first’ is complete bullshit that was fed to me whilst I was doing my A-levels. Many people

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Default Settings

Sometimes, the world just seems impossible to exist in. Sometimes, 8 years of having to battle with your own mind just seems too much. Sometimes, trying to lead the life I ultimately want to live seems out of reach. But despite all that, I still get up every single morning and try my best. Even when my best just doesn’t feel good enough. Even when I feel like I’m not good enough and completely irrelevant.

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Therapy for Ostriches

Plodding through life whilst sticking your head in the sand is something so many of us do, because quite frankly it’s the easiest option. However, it can only get you so far. At least that is what I have found, and I’m sure it is the case for many like me. That’s where therapy comes in.  I’ve known for quite a while that there are many (and I repeat: maaaaaaany) things I need work on –

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Am I enough?

Since finishing university, life has been a bit of a whirlwind – and I think these feelings are definitely many of us experience. Going from full-time education straight into a job, whilst simultaneously attempting to balance the gym and trying to keep myself afloat. It’s been hard. It’s brought up many different feelings, as well as various issues arising which simply add to this perplexing period.  I’ve recently taken up journaling as a way to

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University Life

I’ve waited over a year to be able to write this post, and FINALLY, I am able to do so. Last week, I moved out of my absolutely horrific student house and left the city I have lived in for more or less 4 years. How do I feel? Elated, relieved, sad, lost, and a whole host of other emotions.  With it being mental health awareness week, I thought it would be fitting to share

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For trees to grow, they mustn’t ​​be torn down

Think of all the times you’ve said you were tired, only to be told by your friend that they’re more tired. Or more stressed. How about when you started a new hobby and they made a throwaway comment about how it will only last a week.  How about when your supposed friend repeatedly makes comments that are completely insensitive, despite the effort you make to not do such a thing?  These are common routes that

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From Pain We Learn

I’ve wanted to write for a while now but writing about what I’m truly passionate about has taken a backseat, what with deadlines and life just getting a bit busy. I don’t want to get random words down just for the sake of it – what I write and post and share are things that I truly believe and want to convey in a way that helps others, or at least something that resonates with

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Relationships & Boundaries

Throughout my whole life, I’ve had relationships with various men that have been, in simple terms: horrific. This won’t be a complete sob story of how I’ve struggled with men throughout my life, and really it probably won’t be a very long post in itself, but I do want to give a quick overview of how my issues with developing relationships with men have leaked into other aspects of my life, how it’s affected me

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The Face of Mental Illnesses

Trigger warning: this article contains language related to self-harm, eating disorders and suicide that may be triggering to some individuals.   Emaciated, white female, with blonde hair stood in front of the mirror seeing herself as much bigger than she is. Politely refusing all food offered to her. This is the face of eating disorders. ‘Normal’ looking woman lying in bed, crying her eyes out, self-harming and sat in front of a tub of medications

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What Is Body Positivity?

Media has caught onto the body positive community, but the issue with that is what they are using the term as a synonym for self-love. They’re using the term body positive to describe how you should love yourself exactly as you are. And whilst I agree that everyone should love themselves exactly as they are (cause damn, you’re the only one of you on this planet and that is pretty bloody fantastic), this is not what

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Top Tips for Breaking Up with Calorie Counting

Calorie counting. I can pretty much guarantee that at some point in everyone’s life, they’ve spent time Googling the calorie content of your coffee from your favourite coffee shop or constantly being on a calorie counting app (I’m looking at you MyFitnessPal). For many with eating disorders, this quickly becomes a religious thing – you can’t eat anything without knowing the calorie content of the food you’re putting in your mouth. And if it’s not

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Acne: The Truth Behind Cosmetic Companies

Up until the age of 21, I had pretty clear skin. I complained about a few blemishes here and there, but that’s only because of my perfectionist nature and picking every single part of myself apart. I had a normal skin type, it was smooth, I could put anything on it and it would be okay, it wasn’t sensitive. I had what society would call ‘good’ skin. Shortly after my 21st birthday and starting the weight

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Routines (& Mini Life Update!)

Wake up and have toast for breakfast, grab your favourite coffee on your way to work, eat a packed lunch at 12.30, go to Pilates after work, go home and have a shower, make a warm stew for dinner and sit down to watch your favourite TV programme, wash your face and get into your PJs, take your meds, read a book and fall asleep. Routine. We all have these routines, differing from person to

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Food Is More Than Just Fuel

So, you’ve had a bad day at work and it’s left you feeling exhausted and really low. On your drive back home, you see a sign for Krispy Kreme and suddenly the thought of sitting curled up on the sofa under a blanket, with your favourite TV series and a couple of doughnuts is the most comforting thought to flood your mind. However, earlier that day you were scrolling through Instagram and saw your favourite

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Fitness: Friend or Foe?

There’s a fine line between a healthy relationship with exercise and an unhealthy one – especially in eating disorder recovery. In fact, as many as 75% of ED sufferers struggle with exercise addiction as a way to ‘purge’ calories, reduce the anxiety after eating and/or change their body shape (think body dysmorphic disorder). I remember how I joined a gym in the early stages of my eating disorder, and I was actually too young to

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My Top 3 Tips For Beating Fear Foods

So many eating disorders now develop because of an individual starting some kind of diet, and the main issue with diets is that they are extremely restrictive. Whether or not you’ve gone on to develop an eating disorder, chances are that you’ve been on some sort of diet that involves cutting things out. Paleo, keto, 5:2, Atkins, vegan (so many now choose to become plant-based BECAUSE of it being restrictive, rather than the ethical reasons),

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Are clothing sizes really your size?

A changing room: the room with horrible lights, mirrors everywhere, that seems designed to make you feel like absolute rubbish. I’m going to guess that pretty much everyone has stood there with a pair of jeans, supposedly your usual size, halfway up your legs – leaving you stood there feeling hot and bothered (seriously though, where is the air conditioning?!), with bright lights showcasing lumps and bumps you didn’t even know you had, and feeling

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Do we all scream for ice cream?

I love ice cream. There’s nothing better than an ice cream cone at the sea side or making a fancy dessert with ice cream, fruit and any chocolate pieces that you manage to scavenge in the kitchen. Ice cream can be so comforting – it can be the friend you need during a break up *cue Bridget Jones’s Diary*, a chilled evening with your best friends, or even exactly what you need when that time

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Science vs Obesity

We are constantly flooded with messages from the media about how there’s an ‘obesity pandemic’, and how obesity causes a host of diseases such as diabetes, high blood pressure, stroke and even cancer. How many times has a scientist popped up on your TV to tell you how unhealthy obesity is and how it’s a massive burden on the healthcare system? How many times have seen adverts for diets that claim you can lose weight

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Achievements vs Achievements

Have you ever looked back at you year and thought about how someone else seems to have just done it all better? We live in a world where we are constantly comparing ourselves to others, whether that be how we look, how much we earn, what we drive, what clothes we own and even down to what brand of bread we buy! Whilst some of these are deep routed societal pressures that have been ingrained

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